Where the Healing Begins

The past 3 weeks have been......heh....I'm at a loss for words.  Imagine that!  Me -- at a loss for words!  :-)

Well, I took a kick in the teeth last night.  I was watching the epic Game 6 of the World Series as a song came on the radio.  Yes, I know...Emily doesn't understand how I watch TV and listen to music either.  But, somehow, I can manage both.  Some call this "selective hearing."  I think it's found mostly in husbands, but others may be guilty too.

As I was biting my nails and hollering at the TV (like a true fan!), a song came on the radio by Tenth Avenue North.  The song is called, "Healing Begins" and is goes like this:
"So you thought you had to keep this up
All the work that you do
So we think that you're good
And you can't believe it's not enough
All the walls you built up
Are just glass on the outside

So let 'em fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now

This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark

Afraid to let your secrets out
Everything that you hide
Can come crashing through the door now
But too scared to face all your fear
So you hide but you find
That the shame won't disappear

So let it fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now
We're here now, oh

This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark

Sparks will fly as grace collides
With the dark inside of us
So please don't fight
This coming light
Let this blood come cover us
His blood can cover us

This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within 
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark"

This song slapped me in the face.  Despite blogging about my pain, talking to people on the phone, and visiting with people in person, this song made me realize how much pain I am still holding within.  These lyrics forced me to come to grips with the fact that I have not completely surrendered my pain.  As I continued to listen, I felt this anger well up inside of me.  I thought, "this is a great song.  Why am I angry all of a sudden?"  I immediately felt like sprinting through the streets of our neighborhood to expend all of my nervous energy.  Then, I felt lethargic and not like doing anything.  But then the Rangers' Josh Hamilton hit a towering home run to go up 9-7 in the top of the 10th!!!  Woohoo!  Go Rangers!!  Then, the song ended. 
And the Rangers lost in the 11th inning.